


The Diving Board

by therumandcokediaries



Series: Even A Mandalorian... / Blue Moves [5]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: (this is mainly Din and Peli. Grogu is just in the start and end), Anxiety, Awkward Sexual Situations, Deep Conversations, Developing Relationship, Din Djarin Needs a Hug, Din Djarin Removes the Helmet, F/M, Friendship, Good Parent Din Djarin, Heavy Petting, I'm so stuck on how to tag this so assume this isn't all conclusive, Intimacy, Kissing, Romantic Friendship, Sad Din Djarin, Sensuality, Sexual Content, Soft Din Djarin, Touch-Starved, Touch-Starved Din Djarin, Touching, Vulnerability, anxious din djarin, lonely din djarin, sexual contact
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-17 12:21:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29966307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/therumandcokediaries/pseuds/therumandcokediaries
Summary: Even A Mandalorian Gets NervousDin pit stops at Peli Motto's hangar on Tatooine. Din's a little nervous after their last encounter, but she's more than happy to help him out and spend some time with him. After all, she's grown quite fond of him lately...
Relationships: Din Djarin & Grogu | Baby Yoda, Din Djarin & Peli Motto, Din Djarin/Peli Motto
Series: Even A Mandalorian... / Blue Moves [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2183292
Comments: 3
Kudos: 6





	The Diving Board

**Author's Note:**

> This is so much longer than I intended it to be!  
> I've never written anything like this before, so it might be a little clumsy - but also that means I'm aching to hear any feedback since this is such new territory for me! I always didn't post this; I'm pretty nervous about it!  
> Once again, I wasn't sure on tagging, so let me know if there's something you think needs adding.  
> Thank you so much for reading! Comments/questions encouraged as always!

-

Din closed his eyes and counted to ten, trying to stay calm. Everything was annoying him. Maybe it was lack of sleep, or the pain of the cut across his back, or the constant challenges at every corner, but if one more thing irritated him, he was probably going to explode.

There was a clatter. Din's eyes snapped open.

"Hey! What are you doing?"

Grogu had somehow got into the cupboard where Din kept his best finds - including those funny discs with the music on them, which were now scattered on the floor in their plastic cases.

"I thought I told you-!" Din shouted, but stopped himself. 

Grogu was looking at him with those big eyes, worried and confused. Din swallowed hard. He didn't mean any harm: he was just a kid. Din sighed and knelt down beside him, gathering the discs. 

"Stay out of this cupboard" he said tightly. "These aren't toys, and they can't be replaced"

He put everything back in its place, sighed, and sat down properly, leaning against the cupboard.

"Sorry I shouted. Everything's really grinding on me today"

Grogu looked as though he understood, cooing softly.

"I think I just need a break. Maybe we both do"

Grogu looked down, picking up something Din had missed. Din looked at him,

"What have you got there, little one?"

Grogu smiled and held it out to him. He reached over and took it from him. It was a small bottle of brandy - the one Peli Motto had given him when he'd been ill. He looked at the bottle, and at Grogu.

"Maybe that's not such a good idea"

He'd seen Peli just over a week ago, but it felt like months had passed since then. It hadn't exactly been a normal encounter either. What if it was awkward this time? Peli always seemed to act like everything was simple and easy, but Din wasn't sure he had the same care-free skill - especially if he ended up taking his helmet off again.   
He was distracted by Grogu resting a tiny hand on his. Din sighed and squeezed it gently.

"You're right. We'll change course. It'll be good to see a friend"

At least, he hoped it would be.

-

Peli was engrossed in her work when Din stepped out of the Razor Crest. She was knelt on the ground, working away valiantly, barely looking up when he approached.

"Hey" she said. "Since you're there, can you pass me that spanner?"

Din looked down at the extensive tool collection. It included a lot of spanners. 

"Which one?"

"A ratcheting ring one" she said, not looking up.

Din wasn't exactly a stranger to DIY, but the only spanner differentiation he knew was 'big' and 'small'. 'Ratcheting ring' didn't mean anything to him. He guessed it was one of the ones compromising a full circle and not a 'c' shape, but that still left a good handful to choose from. He grabbed one at random and hoped for the best as he held it out to her. She had to look then.

"I said a ratcheting one"

"Oh, right..."

Din surveyed the collection again. They all looked pretty much the same to him. Peli looked up, sensing his uncertainty.

"It's the one with the black plastic inside the rings"

"Oh" Din picked it up and handed it over.

"Thanks" she said. "Do you need repairs or is this just a pit stop?"

"The second one" Din said, sitting down by the toolbox.

"You sound tired"

"The child hasn't been sleeping the last few nights. He's kept me up"

Peli glanced at him, smiling at the little creature in his arms. "Couple of bad nights, little one?"

Grogu stayed quiet, clinging to Din's arm. 

"I'm nearly finished here" Peli said. "Do you wanna come inside for a drink? Might be nice for this little guy to have a bit of quiet and steady ground"

"That's kind of you" Din said awkwardly.

"Well, I could do with taking a break from all this dust for a bit anyway. It's been a long day"

"I know the feeling"

Grogu slipped off Din's arm, wandering off distractedly.

"I didn't expect you back this soon" Peli was saying. "And another part of me expected you back sooner"

"Well, I suppose that puts me somewhere in the middle of your prediction then"

There was a sudden loud, metallic clatter, and the sound of Grogu squeaking. Din scurried to his feet. Jeez, that kid could move fast when he wanted to. He rushed and grabbed him out of the way before another canister could fall.

"You're going to hurt yourself one of these days if you're not careful!" he sighed angrily, his heart thudding from the fear the clatter had given him. "Don't wander off like that!"

"Is he ok?"

"He's fine" Din said, returning to her. He breathed out. "Sorry about that"

"Don't be. No harm done" she set her tools down and looked up at Din properly. "It's good to see you again"

"...It's good to see you, too"

"Well, I'm done here" Peli said, snapping her toolbox closed and standing up. "How about that drink?"

-

Walking into Peli's flat felt strange - familiar, yet foreign, like a place you'd seen in a dream and then stumbled across in real life. It looked the same, although he hadn't taken a huge amount of notice the first time. The door opened to an open plan living/dining/kitchen area, dimly lit but not dingy or unpleasant. Grogu struggled in Din's arms, restless.

"You can put him down" Peli said. "He'll be safe in here, and there's nothing he can break that can't be replaced"

"Well, if you're sure..."

Din carefully set the child down on his feet. Grogu looked around for a moment and then toddled off the explore his new surroundings.

"He seems happy enough" Peli said. "Tea ok for you?"

"Yeah, that's fine..." he said, not really paying attention.

He knew Grogu was safe and Peli wasn't the sort to get cross if anything got knocked over, but he was still wary of the possibility. He kept a close eye on him, just to make sure. He didn't stop looking until Peli pressed a mug into his hand. 

"He's fine" she said. "Stop worrying"

"I'm not"

"You are. The helmet might hide your face but I can still sense your fatherly concern"

Din looked down at his mug, complete with its bamboo straw. Today felt very different to the last time. The atmosphere was different. It was comfortable, but he wasn't sure he liked it: it made him doubt his memory. Mostly, he liked that Peli acted like nothing had happened last time, but a small part of him wanted her to talk about it. Not that he'd ever initiate it himself, or even respond if she _did_ bring it up. Still, at least it would validate it.

"You're allowed to sit down, you know"

He couldn't think of a valid reason not to, so he joined her on the sofa. He felt weird, like he shouldn't really be there. 

"Busy week?"

Din nodded slightly. He was watching Grogu, ready to jump and grab him if he got into mischief.

"He seems to be coping with lost sleep pretty well"

Again, Din simply nodded. That little green thing seemed to have infinite energy when the mood struck him. Peli looked at Din, starting to get irritated.

"Nice to see you in good health this time" she tried.

Din didn't react. Peli cleared her throat.

"I put a bit of dragon blood in the tea this time. Hope you don't mind"

Din twitched, turning to her. "What?"

"Oh, you can hear me, then" Peli said, smiling at her small victory.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to ignore you" Din sighed, sitting back. "I'm just a bit distracted"

"I can tell... You are allowed to relax, Mando" she said, resting a hand on his knee. 

Din stiffened for a moment, but made himself relax a little. This was a good thing, wasn't it?

"...We're friends, aren't we?" he said.

"Last I checked"

He wasn't sure what to do after that. He couldn't think of what to say, so he just stayed quiet and drank his tea. He kept his eyes down, looking at his mug, and at Peli's hand, which was rested on his thigh now. Not that he minded. Not exactly. He wasn't sure what it meant, but the gentle, warm weight was nice. Wasn't it?

"That kid's gonna burn himself out soon" Peli said.

Din looked at Grogu. He was definitely slowing down, but it could just be that he was used to the surroundings now.

"You know, I've got an old cot in the corridor. You can settle him there if you want"

"Well, I suppose it couldn't hurt. I'm willing to try anything at this point"

Peli laughed slightly, getting up and taking his empty mug from him. "You're such a dad sometimes"

Din stood and scooped Grogu up. "Don't fuss. Sleep time, ok?"

"It's just through here"

-

The cot was old, distressed wood, but sturdy.

"Why do you have this?"

"The same reason you've got music from another galaxy"

Din nodded. He knew it was easy to acquire strange items in some trades. Grogu looked a little surprised when he was placed in the cot, but he soon settled.

"Maybe you were right about the steady ground thing"

"I think most of us are the same, even if we spend most of our time in motion" she watched him carefully. "He seems happy enough. You should leave him. He won't sleep with you staring"

"I don't want to go too far. Just in case"

"Well, you could always sit through here" she said, motioning to the door to their left. "You won't disturb him, but you'll be closer than you would be in the living room"

Din nodded and Peli held the door open for him. In hindsight, he shouldn't have been surprised when he walked into a bedroom. What else would it have been?

"Your bed looks huge"

"Pays to have a bit of space" she said, closing the door behind them. "It's not _that_ big"

"Bigger than the one on the Crest: mine is just barely a single"

"Well, this is no mansion, but I don't lack space"

"You don't have any windows"

"Not in here, I don't"

"There's none in the bathroom either"

"This place is essentially built into a rock face. Windows at the front only, I'm afraid. Not that it should make a difference to you: you don't have windows on that ship"

"Well, I do in the cockpit"

Peli just shook her head, amused. "Why don't you sit down?"

Din looked at the bed. Ok, so was this convenience, or was it something else? Even so, he did as requested. Peli sat beside him, leaving a few feet between them.

"Comfortable?"

Din just looked at her. She didn't seem put off.

"So" Din said awkwardly. "No Mr Motto?"

Peli burst out laughing, making him jump. "You're a funny one, Mandalorian!"

"It's a valid question, isn't it?"

"Maybe, but one you already knew the answer to, surely?" she shook her head slightly. "I've had a lot of fun, but there's never been anyone as serious as that. Plus, I like my little empire. Most men I've been with have wanted to change something about it"

"But if it's yours, surely how you run it wouldn't be any of their business?"

" _Thank_ you! See, at least you've got your head screwed on right! I like what I do. I've had more than one guy tell me that I'd never have to work again if I was with that, as it that would be a _good_ thing"

"You'd just get bored, wouldn't you?"

"Sure would. Especially if I _had_ ended up with those guys. Bad news, most of them"

"Violent?"

"Not usually" Peli said. "Just stuck in their ways, and definitely not compatible with mine"

Din nodded, mostly understanding. "More trouble than they were worth?"

"Definitely. I wasn't sad to see most of them go, and with some of them I was ecstatic! There's a lot of stories I could tell"

"I bet..."

There was something different about her now: she was more layered. He could glimpse at her past, and it was intriguing.

"Who was the worse one?" he asked.

"Oh god, I don't know. It's such a spectrum! Ok, let me think... Oh, I had this little ship once. Tiny thing, but great for day trips, that sort of thing. Nothing special but it got the job done, and it was a pretty little model. It was my pride and joy, part of the reason I got into mechanics. Anyway, my first proper boyfriend lost his job and sold it to fund his tobacco and alcohol habit"

"Oh god! I'd have killed him"

"I nearly did! Luckily there was a bunch of people around when I found out, who stopped any fatalities. I couldn't even get it back because he'd sold it to someone going off world. I never saw it again. Or him. I'm still not sure I forgive him"

"I don't blame you. Why did he think it was acceptable to do it?"

"You tell me. He was one of those guys who thought everything I owned, he owned. That little ship had been given to me by my late father, too. It took me a long time to get over that one"

Din reached out and took her hand in his. Peli smiled slightly.

"It was a long time ago. I was only eighteen"

"I bet you were quite the caution back then"

"People started calling me a ballbreaker way before that. I could definitely put on a good show. Very headstrong and unapologetically honest. Still, despite what people said, a lot of them _did_ dare cross me. Some of them successfully"

"Those are good qualities, aren't they?"

"Well. Once I managed them, I suppose so. I got myself into a lot of trouble first. Not with the law; just with people. I made a reputation for myself"

"Well, I know that feeling"

Peli smiled at him. "You're a good listener, you know"

"Oh"

"It's a compliment, Mando" she squeezed his hand. "You can be good company when the mood strikes you"

Din recognised that look. He shouldn't, not really, but he did, and he knew what it meant. Oh dear. He wasn't sure about this.

"I was going to apologise to you, actually"

"...What for?"

"Well, last time you were here. I kinda backed you into a corner, figuratively speaking. I know it throw you off"

"Oh. It's fine" Din said awkwardly.

"Is it? After you left, I thought about it and I couldn't help feeling bad. You were shaking a lot"

Din could feel himself turning red. Thank god for his helmet.

"I'm just out of practice" he said. "I'm... I'm not used to being touched. Not like that. Not when I'm not fighting. Just because I froze a bit, doesn't mean it wasn't..."

It was hard to tell what he was thinking when his face was hidden, Peli thought. There was a lot she could say, but she settled for the simplest course of action.

"Wasn't what?"

Din swallowed hard. "...Nice?"

It wasn't quite the word she had expected.

"Would you do it again?"

Din didn't say anything. He could see negatives in both answers.

"What do you want, Mando?"

"Well, what do _you_ want?" Din shot back, despite the kind tone she'd offered the question with.

"I thought I'd made that clear?" she said.

"Evidently not"

She narrowed her eyes for a moment, but quickly realised he was only snapping because he was nervous.

"Tell me what you want from me!" he demanded.

"I want to have sex with you, obviously"

Din dropped her hand like it was red hot. Oh boy.

"Is that really such a shock? I thought I'd propositioned you pretty clearly"

"It's just... _hearing_ it, I suppose..."

"So, what do you think?"

Din thought about it. There _were_ things he wanted from her, physical things, but he wasn't sure sex was actually on the list. He tried to imagine doing it, but as soon as it got to that final stage in his mind, he felt a bit sick, and not in the good way he had in the bathroom last time he was here. Even the version of him in his head couldn't get the deed done without squirming and backing out at the last second, and he wasn't even real.  
Peli was looking at him expectantly, waiting for an answer.

"...I don't think I can go that far"

Peli looked disappointed for a moment, and then thoughtful.

"We don't have to go all the way. There's a lot of other stuff we could do. If you wanted to"

"Maybe..."

Peli looked at him, pained. "I can't communicate with you properly like this. Please don't fight me on this"

Din startled when she put her hands on his helmet, but he swallowed his pride and let her take it off him, even though he immediately felt much more vulnerable, like this was actually happening. Peli set his helmet aside, not taking her eyes off him.

"Oh god, you're so cute"

"...You think I'm cute?"

"I've just told you I want to have sex with you!" Peli exclaimed. "Of _course_ I think you're cute!"

"...Are you going to kiss me now?"

Peli sighed, noting the pained look behind his eyes. "Do you want me to?"

"...Yes"

"Then I will"

And she did, carefully, slowly at first. She didn't want to scare him off. Din felt sick with nerves, but he kissed her back, shuddering when she put her arms round him. He did the same, focusing on how close he felt to her. His breathing had changed; he couldn't help noticing. He felt like he didn't really know what he was doing, but he noticed every little detail and focused on it; on how warm and soft and tender their embrace was. He couldn't bring himself to close his eyes, a part of him needing to be fully aware of what was happening, but he did manage to calm down. This felt good, like it meant something. Didn't it? He couldn't turn his mind off and just experience the moment: it was that internal struggle between ' _We shouldn't be doing this_ ' and _oh god, but I want to_ '. And he _did_ want to, definitely. It felt so good to be close to another person. Until he felt her tongue against his.  
He pulled back quickly, nose wrinkled.

"Woah. Everything ok?"

"Fine" Din said, turning his head away.

"Ohh, not a fan of tongue?"

Din shook his head slightly. "No... Sorry"

"It's fine, don't worry. Shall we go again?"

Din hesitated. She put her hand on the side of his face, making him look at her. 

"No more tongue, I promise"

Somehow that was enough to reassure him. She kept her hand on his face, stroking his skin as she kissed him. He relaxed into her, holding her again, tight. Somehow this time was better. Slow and deep, caring. Comfortable. Din let his eyes close. This was good, he could enjoy this. He _was_ enjoying this. Peli was too. She pushed against him, and he had to put a hand on the bed behind him to steady himself. Peli put a hand on the inside of his elbow, pushed gently so he arm collapsed. He startled a little to find himself suddenly propped up on his elbows, one step away from being flat on his back.

"Is this ok?"

Din nodded. She smiled and kissed him again, running her hands over his armour. He shivered slightly, still feeling her through the thick layers. She kissed his neck forcefully, reaching down, touching his stomach, slipping her hand between his legs-

Din gasped, grabbing her wrist and pushing her away, sitting up quickly. It all happened in a split second. Peli sat back on her heels, watching him. He looked scared all of a sudden, betrayed, even. 

"Are you ok?"

"I'm fine!" he all but growled.

"I'm sorry" Peli said. "I didn't mean to... To go so fast. I should have-"

"No" Din interrupted, catching his breath. " _I'm_ sorry. You made me jump, I just... I'm sorry"

"Don't be. It's fine" she carefully reached out and took his hand. "I mean it. It's fine"

"It's not. I was... Stupid"

"You weren't! I was pushing it"

Din squeezed her hand hard. "Well. Thank you for understanding"

"Shall we take a breather?"

Din nodded. He still felt very shaky inside.

"Let's talk. if we're going to do this - whatever it might be - we need to be clear on the boundaries, don't you think?"

"...I'm not sure I can talk about it"

"I'm not doing anything without discussing it first" she said. "...You're not really feeling this, are you?"

"I wouldn't say that" he looked down at their hands, swallowing a lot, trying to think of how to voice it. "...We don't really..."

"Know each other properly yet?" Peli guessed. "I know. All the more reason for us to talk. Lighten the mood a bit?"

"Ok" Din agreed. "I know we've talked before, but..."

"Superficially, mostly? I know it's been quite a disjointed conversation most of the time. But it's just us now, no interruptions"

"So, what should we talk about?"

"Whatever you want"

"I don't know" Din sighed. "Nothing too deep..."

"Brutal honestly, no holds barred, that's what we need" Peli said. "Warts and all"

"You mean, like, sharing personal stuff, like the sort of thing we wouldn't tell anyone else?"

"Sure. You still look a bit flustered. Would it make you feel better if we shared embarrassing facts about ourselves?"

"Maybe... You first"

"Ok" Peli considered. "The first time I went out drinking with friends, like proper heavy drinking, I overdid it and threw up all over the only guy there that I fancied"

"Oh boy, that's pretty bad" Din said.

"I know! I hadn't eaten either so it was literally just, alcohol. Dreadful. Ok, now you"

"Umm..." Din thought for a moment, grateful of the distraction. "I usually gag when I brush me teeth because my gag reflex is so bad. I've made myself sick numerous times because of it"

"Oh wow" Peli laughed slightly. "That's a weird one. Ok, let me think of another one. Uh... Ok, when I was a little kid I had to take spare clothes to school every day because I wet myself so often"

"Oh jeez. Poor tiny you" Din said, realising that total honesty no matter the implications was definitely on the agenda here. "Ok, well, similar... When I was twenty-three, someone picked a fight with me at a really inconvenient time and it wasn't one I could walk away from. I really needed a wee, like to the point where it really hurt, and the fight went on for ages, and at one point he hit me really hard in the lower belly and I-"

Peli burst out laughing before he could finish the sentence. "You didn't! No way!"

"I did, and I had to finish the fight too"

"Oh my god!" Peli laughed. "What did you _do_?"

"Won the fight quickly and retreated to my ship to sort myself out. I was pretty mortified but no one else ever knew about it. Till now"

"That's an incredible story" Peli tried to stifle her giggles. "I'd better up the ante. Ok, so I've never told anyone this one either. It was ages ago but anyway, one time I went home with this guy, and it was a bit of a gamble anyway. He was weird, and once we started getting busy, he said he'd give me tonight as a taster, but if I wanted more I'd have to marry him. So you can imagine how much that killed the mood for me"

Din nodded. His heart rate had slowed and he felt so much calmer.

"I just pretended I needed the toilet first and escaped to the bathroom. There was no way I was hanging about after that, and the only way out was the bathroom window. Luckily I had my shoes on, but I was wearing a skirt that night, so climbing out wasn't gonna be easy. It wasn't too high, luckily - there was a hill right below the window, but it one of those really old windows with metal catches, and as I was climbing out, my skirt got caught on it and ripped, properly"

"Oh boy" Din couldn't help laughing.

"It was worse than that! We'd got started in the bedroom, so my knickers were on the bedroom floor, and with my skirt ripped and caught as badly as it was, I'm basically out in the cold, half naked, having to somehow get home without being seen"

"How the heck did you manage that?" Din laughed, covering his mouth. 

Peli smiled at him, laughing too. "It got worse! I tripped going down the hill and had a proper fall, caught my foot, heard a snap. So then I'm stuck with a busted ankle, thankfully drunk but still in pain. Thank god I knew where I was! So there I am, all the worst parts on show, broken ankle, limping home, ducking behind shrubs and walls every time I heard a voice or saw a light. Genuinely the most difficult half hour of my life. I have no idea how I managed it without being seen. Hey, it's not _that_ funny!"

"It really is!"

Peli laughed too, both because of the memory, and the way Din tried to hide his face when he laughed.

"You've got a naughty giggle, Mando"

"So, what did your parents say?"

"Oh no, I lived alone by this time, so luckily I had no one to answer to when I got back. I just had to grab whatever clothes I could to get decent again, and then call my doctor friend and get him to bail me out with the ankle"

"Didn't you tell him what happened?"

"No! I just said I'd fallen down a hill - which wasn't exactly a lie! There's no way I was gonna say I ended up limping home half naked after escaping a bad date through a bathroom window!"

Din didn't know why the story had tickled him so much, but he couldn't stop laughing. Maybe it was the images in his head. He didn't protest when Peli pushed him onto his back and flopped beside him, laughing too.

"That laugh! This is why I never told anyone before!"

"That's a bloody brilliant story!"

"I'm glad you think so! What about you? Any wild sex escapes?"

Din's laughter died down. "Not really my area. I'm a Mandalorian; we don't have nightclub-and-drunk-dating phases. I spent my twenties working and training"

"I bet you've got some right stories" Peli said, but she didn't push it.

"Did you see him again?"

"No. Luckily he left to go join some kinda organisation somewhere else. A friend told me. Probably just as well"

"He was probably mad anyway"

"Yeah, probably... I once elbowed someone in the face during sex"

Din burst out laughing again. He felt comfortable beside her, looking at the ceiling, his stomach aching with laughter.

"How did you manage that?"

"Oh, it was an accident! He was this guy I'd had my eye on for a long time, as did most people. He was really something! Although, actually, he wasn't that great in the bedroom. It was a bit of a let down" she shook her head slightly. "Anyway, I pulled, so he came back to mine and we were both a bit drunk and we decided we may as well end the night with a bang. So we stumble around for a bit and he ended up being pretty greedy, but I decided to let it slip. Anyway, we're having sex, and midway through he starts scratching my back, like, really hard, and I'm not into that. It made me bleed, actually. I found that afterwards. So anyway, I'm telling him to stop, and he doesn't, so I get angry and try to get him off me, and I manage to get my arms up and somehow smack my elbow straight into his eye"

"Sounds like he deserved it"

"Well, maybe! So he reels backwards, and there's this whole nervous apologising thing, and he's already got the start of a black eye going on. Still, we kinda make up and decide to carry on, and we finish - well, he does, if you get my drift. And we part ways and I'm fine with that at first"

"Ah" Din said. "I guess you saw this one again?"

"Oh yeah, and it wasn't a great reunion, I can tell you that!" she said. "I see him in the local bar the next night, and he's got this major black eye from my elbow, so I feel a bit bad at first. But then I get closer, and he's been telling everyone that he won a fight, all that; 'you should see the other guy' rubbish, and me being young and arrogant, I don't like that. He smiles when he sees me, looks a bit nervous when he sees I'm angry"

"Did you hit him again?"

"I thought about it! Nah, a few people asked why I was angry with him, and he tried to brush it off so I just came out and told everyone there was no fight; he'd got the black eye when I'd elbowed him in the face during sex, and I told them the whole truth too! He wasn't happy, but I wasn't a liar and he couldn't convince anyone I was"

"Good. I'm glad he got put to rights"

"Me too, although it was pretty scary. I'll admit I was shaking for a good fifteen minutes after that, and I cried a bit just because of the adrenaline. He left the area a couple of weeks later and I wasn't sad to see him go"

"I bet. That's another good one. I think you might be fiercer than I first thought"

"Is that a compliment? I just didn't like the way he lied about it when there was no need to. And like I said, he was a greedy lover, and I don't go in for that if I can help it. If I don't get anything out of it, there's not much point"

"So, most people you've been with... Have they been ok?"

Peli turned her head to look at him. "I'll admit I'm experienced. I wanted to have fun. I did, mostly. But I've had a lot of selfish lovers, some dreamboats who disappointed and some below-average-looking ones who were incredible. I've had a decent range"

"...Ever had any like me?"

"In what way?"

"Well..." he swallowed, his chest feeling tight again. "Unable to perform?"

Peli laughed. "Sorry! Sorry. Just that's usually for people who can't get it up"

"You know what I mean"

"Yes, but _you_ don't. You're not 'unable to perform': you're just nervous. You don't want to rush it, and I understand that" she said. "You're different to other people I've been in bed with"

"Because I don't want to go all the way?"

"No. Well, maybe. But that isn't what I was thinking. I just meant, you actually listen to me"

"Don't other people?"

"I had a serious boyfriend who sold my prized possession behind my back. Do you really think I've had that much luck with men?"

"Mm. Well, I thought you would have done. You're appealing, aren't you?"

Peli laughed. "What's that supposed to mean? Aw, Mando, you're a sweetheart. You're happy just talking, aren't you?"

"You said we should"

"Yeah, but it's still nice that we have"

Din finally turned his head to look at her. She looked back. She usually had pretty dire taste in men, but underneath his helmet, this Mandalorian was considerate and respectful and sensitive. And cute. She knew he liked him before she first saw him with his helmet off, but she was still glad he was pretty. It made liking him easier.

"Why don't you take the armour off?"

Din sat up and started doing just that. He trusted Peli, he knew she was a safe person. He set everything down with the helmet and pulled his shirt off, leaving just his lower half covered. That was as much as he was comfortable with.

"What happened to your back?"

Din froze. He'd forgotten about that. "It's just an impact wound"

"It's a pretty big one"

"It's nothing"

Peli touched it gently. "Does it hurt?"

"Not really. Only if you press it hard"

"Poor old Mando"

She kissed the very top of the cut, and then the back of his neck. Din stayed still, not sure how he felt about this. She wound her arms round him, and he looked at her hands, linked in front of his chest. Ok. Right...  
She rested her chin on his shoulder.

"Is this ok?"

Din nodded. It couldn't be back, could it? Just the contact against his bare skin felt welcome. She was being gentle. She was kissing his shoulder now, making him shiver. Ok, this was fine. It felt ok, didn't it? Wow, ok, actually, it was starting to feel nice. He put his hand over hers, trying to offer her something, some sort of indication. He let himself start to relax back into her. She liked him; she wouldn't hurt him. It felt strange trusting someone this way. He wasn't quite sure how they'd reached this point.

"Why don't you lie down?" Peli suggested. "You might be more comfortable that way"

"I'm not sure"

"If you want to stop, just tell me. I'd much rather do this at your pace"

Din felt sick with nerves again. It could just be that she didn't know how else to word it, but it sounded to him like she was still expecting sex somewhere down the line. He didn't really know what else could be expected from him.  
Still, he let her push him onto his back. He shifted a little, trying to get comfortable. He looked up at Peli, feeling very small now he was essentially at her mercy. She ran her fingers gently through his hair, looking at him closely. 

"Are you sure this is ok?"

Din couldn't speak. He took hold of her hand and squeezed it, looking her in the eye. She smiled at him. She had a good smile, the kind that made you feel safe.

"Ok, sweetheart. We'll go slow and just see what happens" she said. "But you owe me another embarrassing story first"

It was a ploy on her part. If she could get him to talk, she'd be certain he was ok. If he couldn't, she'd know he wasn't ready for this. She kept stroking his hair.

"I don't have the same sort as you..." he said in a small voice.

"It doesn't have to be the same. But I've shared more than you, so spill"

"W-well... I suppose..." he could only think of one story. "I had this catch once, that I picked up. Bounty, you know... Well, they were a bit funny about being caught. Usually people put up a fight, but they just looked upset and sighed and let me take them. They said they knew I'd catch up to them eventually. They just gave in, so it was easy taking them in. I didn't need to restrain them so I just let them sit in the cockpit with me..."

"Ok" Peli said, encouraging him gently. "Then what happened?"

"Well, it was quiet for a while. It often is: most people who I catch are a bit scared of me. But then they said thank you. They said thank you for not hurting them or freezing them for convenience and stuff like that. It was a proper thank you, and it caught me off guard, so for some reason I slipped up and said; no problem, I love you too"

Peli laughed, and Din did too, just a little. He felt a bit better now. Less nervous.

"Ridiculous. What did they do?"

"Well, luckily they just thought I was winding them up, so they just pretended to be amused and stayed quiet. I was embarrassed though. Not that they could tell"

"That's cute. We've all made that sort of slip before" she said, amused, and relieved. "Well, that levels the playing field, I think"

"Does that mean you're going to kiss me now?"

"That's what I was thinking" she said. "You seemed to like having your neck kissed last time you were here"

"Is that what you're going to do?"

"Honey, I'll do whatever you want. Just make sure you tell me if it gets too much"

Din nodded. He still felt nervous, but in a good way. He felt ready for this. Whatever 'this' was. Peli ducked her head, and Din gasped. She didn't hold back, and for a couple of seconds neither did he. But then he became hyper-aware of the sounds he was making, and he clamped a hand down over his mouth to stop them, horrible embarrassed. Surely he could enjoy this without being vocal about it? He screwed his eyes closed, trying to control himself. He was shaking, just like the time before. Jeez, being this close to someone, being touched by them, was so weird. He felt so strange and shivery, pleasant, but oddly jittery too. He really wasn't used to this at all. Every touch felt so intense, like he was feeling it all a little _too_ much.   
Peli pulled back, looking down at him. 

"Spread your legs"

He didn't see any reason to object. She wasn't going to do what had stopped them earlier - was she?

"A bit more. I'm not as slim as I once was"

Din did as he was told, his pulse thudding hard in his ears. Peli settled herself between his legs, making him gasp when she grabbed his thighs.

"Ok?"

Din nodded, flat on his back, his breath quickening. Oh god. He wasn't sure about this. He fought to stay quiet, not wanting to upset her by backing out. It was probably just nerves. He bit his lower lip, watching her, shuddering at her touch. He took hold of hand, and she raised it to her mouth and kissed it. She kissed down his arm to his shoulder, finally settling on his neck again. Din let a little whine escape him. Oh. Ok, this was better, he liked this bit. Just as his nerves started to settle, she moved. Din shuddered, twitched, whining low in his throat, gripping the bedcovers as she kissed his front. She was still gentle, still caring, but it felt different. He'd wanted so badly to be touched last time, but this was so different to what he expected: for one, he'd expected her hands to do the work, not her mouth. He didn't seem to have any control over what his body was doing; the way it reacted to being touched like this. It was a lot of twitching, he noted, jerking of muscles, and involuntary gasping. He closed his eyes tight. He didn't want this. He didn't like not being in control of what his body was doing. It felt weird. This was all so much heavier than the last time. 

"You're not falling asleep, are you?"

Din opened his eyes, raised an eyebrow almost comedically. Peli kissed him hard on the lips, grabbing his thigh with one hand. This was better, Din thought. It was so simple, but kissing felt so good. He liked being so close to her. Somehow, directly under her felt so much closer than just being held by her. He didn't need any more than this.   
She ground her hips against his, and Din let out a gasp - more a cry - totally taken aback by the movement and the sensation it caused. He was shaking more now, gasping louder, and he didn't know what he was supposed to do. He wasn't sure about this, he really wasn't. It all felt a bit too much, but he couldn't speak to say so, the words catching in his throat. He wasn't sure he wanted her to know. She looked down at him, and he suddenly grabbed her shoulders, pulling her down to kiss him again. It was clumsy, and there was a little knocking of noses, but they recovered quickly. Din gripped her shoulders, trembling, struggling to kiss her back properly. He hadn't expected it to be like this. He liked the kissing, he liked the feel of her hands, but he didn't know about the rest of it, especially being humped like this. It was too much. He didn't know what he should focus on. Her hand was still on his thigh, almost restraining him. Din turned his head away, so Peli kissed his neck instead. He tried to focus on that, tried to enjoy it, but he was shaking so much, feeling everything so intensely. He felt sick, and hot, breaking out in a cold sweat. Everything felt blurry at the edges, unreal but also _too_ real at the same time. When Peli suddenly grabbed his behind his heart almost broke through his ribs and he was struck with a huge sense of panic; crying out, gasping, clamping his hands over his mouth as tears filled his eyes and spilled down his temples.

All in an instant Peli moved off him and placed her hands firmly on his shoulders.

"Hey, hey, you're ok" she said, gently but firmly. "It's alright"

Din looked up at her, breathing fast, gasping behind his hands.

"Hey. Hey, just breathe, Mando" Peli said, pushing his hair back from his forehead and looking him in the eye. "You need to slow your breathing. You're ok, I promise"

He could barely see her through his tears. He felt awful - and stupid. He didn't know why he'd gotten himself into such a state over what was essentially just a quick grope. He took one hand away from his mouth, and she took hold of it, keeping her other hand on his head. 

"I'm sorry" she said. "I got a bit carried away"

Din took a very deep breath, trying to control himself, and sat up, keeping his head down. He was still shaking, those stupid tears dripping down his cheeks. He felt like such an idiot. Peli wrapped a blanket round him and pulled him close, kissing him firmly on the temple. 

"You should have told me I was going too fast for you"

Din didn't say anything - he was too busy trying not to cry. He felt like a right prick. This didn't happen to other people: they just got on with it and had a quick shag without hesitation - and he couldn't even cope with a bit of kissing. God, he was so embarrassed. What must Peli think of him?  
After a minute or so he shifted and clung to her, resting his chin on her shoulder. She held him more securely, kissing just below his ear and resting a hand on the back of his head.

Din closed his eyes. "...I'm sorry..."

Peli paused, and then held him tighter. "You've got nothing to be sorry for"

"I didn't mean to lead you on"

"You didn't! Aw, Mando... Hey, don't cry! Oh sweetheart. You'll set _me_ off if you're not careful"

He couldn't help it, and it made him feel even worse, even more pathetic. Which just made him cry harder. What had started as gentle tears had turned to sobs. He buried his face in Peli's shoulder.

"I'm sorry for being such an idiot!"

"Hey, don't you dare" she said firmly, resting a hand on the back of his head. He sounded so sad and ashamed, and she couldn't stand it. "Stop it. It doesn't matter, honestly. I don't mind"

"I don't believe you..!"

Peli rested her cheek against the top of his head. "Mando, I never even expected to get to kiss you, let alone spend time with you like this. I was pushing my luck anyway. Honestly, stopping isn't a big deal"

He'd calmed a fraction. "...It is. It feels like it is"

"It's not. Hey, Mando, look at me"

"I can't"

"Yes you can"

She put her hands on his shoulders and tried to move him back. He resisted at first, but not for long. He sat back, head down, furiously scrubbing tears from his cheeks. Peli put a hand on the side of his head and made him look at her. Again, he resisted, but soon gave in. She kissed his upper lip gently, and held his head in her hands.

"Look at me. I'm not going to lie to you" she said. "I don't mind. As long as you're ok, that's all that matters. I went too fast, you weren't ready, and our communication could do with some work. That's it. It's not big deal. I still got to spend time with you"

Din pulled away from her. She was kind. Too kind. This might be easier if she wasn't; if she gave him an excuse to get angry at her as well as himself. He swallowed hard, taking another deep, juddering breath, trying to compose himself.

"If we're gonna do this again, we need to have a proper talk about it, and we need to communicate properly. You're the kind who likes to enjoy things quietly, but you are allowed to speak to me"

"I didn't really feel like talking" he mumbled.

"I could tell. The only noises you were making were involuntary" she took his hand and kissed the back of it. "You've got enough mystique going on when you're dressed. You don't need to try to uphold that when it's just us. Talk to me, ok?"

Din nodded. He was still trembling, still struggling to drink everything in, but he was feeling better than he had done. He swallowed and looked at her.

"So... Are we... Do we have another go now?"

Peli smiled softly and pulled the blanket round him better. "That's enough for one day"

He looked at her, confused.

"Sweetheart. You're not ready, and I'm not going to push you down and force you into so much as a hand-hold you don't want" she said. "Truth be told, I've really come to care about you. I don't want to accidentally hurt or upset your or whatever"

She stood up from the bed, going over to the water cooler in the corner and returning with a cup full. She sat down beside him and handed it to him.

"It might help with the shaking"

Din nodded, raising the cup to his lips. 

"Woah, slow down! You'll give yourself a stomach ache going that fast"

He slowed down a little, but drained the cup quickly. She was right; it did help with the shaking. He cleared his throat.

"I did say I was out of practice"

Peli offered a sad smile at his feeble attempt at humour, but she didn't laugh. She had a lot of respect for the man beside her, but she had a feeling he was a lot more fragile than he let on. She could draw her own conclusions.

"I know the feeling" she said. "I haven't been with anyone in fifteen years"

Din looked at her in disbelief. "You're joking"

"No, I'm not" she set his cup aside and put her arm round him. "I've already said I don't lie"

"But you're so-..." he couldn't think of the right word.

"Experienced?"

"...Nice"

"Well, being nice doesn't get you everywhere"

"What happened?" he asked, sensing something wasn't quite right.

"I'll tell you some other time But evidently I'm out of practice too"

Din nodded slightly. "...It didn't feel like it"

"Is that a compliment?" she sighed and kissed him on the cheek. "You make some pretty cute noises, you know"

"Oh no" he could feel himself blushing. "I really tried not to"

"You shouldn't. I always liked hearing what I was doing to people"

Din paused, glancing behind him, lightheaded and a little dizzy. "I feel... Is it ok if I lay down for a minute?"

"You don't have to ask my permission"

She joined him, holding his hand in both of hers.

"It can be intimidating, being in that position" she said. "I was never really a fan when it was me on the bottom, but you seemed ok"

"I didn't really consider... Positions. And roles. It just sort of happened, didn't it?"

"It usually does. You know how it is: it's just a big game of trial and error. You just see how it goes"

Din sighed, trying to focus on his breathing. He was glad he'd stopped shaking, but he still felt a bit on edge. He had a feeling he wouldn't be allowed to weasel out of this conversation.

"I know we made a few mistakes" she was saying. "But those aside, did you enjoy it?"

Din turned his head, looking at her. She looked back, glad to see the fear and panic had drained from his eyes.

"Most of it" Din said. "Even though it felt weird. Like I said earlier; I don't get to experience non-combat contact often. I'm not used to it"

"You must get lonely, being a Mandalorian"

"... This is the way"

"Can I ask you something? I know you just get called by what you are, but you must have a real name too, right?"

"Doesn't everyone?"

"Well, yeah. So if your name a secret too, like your face is supposed to be?"

Din nodded. Maybe they were thinking the same thing: if she'd seen his face (and a lot more than that), especially more than once, would sharing a name really matter?

"Do you want to tell me?"

"Yes" Din said, turning back to the ceiling. "But I can't. I'm not going to"

"Ok. I respect that"

"You've been on top before, haven't you?" he said, changing the subject.

"Not as much as I'd have liked" Peli said. "There was a lot of stuff I wanted to do but never got the chance to. Most men like to take control with women. Even when I was young and fierce. There were a few who would let me take control, some begrudgingly, but they'd usually flip everything round after a couple of minutes"

"Did it annoy you?"

"Massively, especially when they acted like they were doing me a huge favour. I always got cross, but most of the time I still slept with them, just to scratch an itch, you know? Just lie back and think of Tatooine. It gets a job done. And like we established, I was good with my elbows if anyone tried any funny business"

Din smiled, laughing a little. "Your stories were good"

"I've got plenty more, too. The things I could tell you! One day I'll take you to the bar and point out everyone I've slept with. A lot of them are still milling about"

"Might be a long evening"

"Hey!" she slapped him playfully. "Well, maybe you're right. I saw so many people lose their youth and I didn't want to be one of them. I could have done anything, but in my mind, making the most of my youth revolved around training to be a mechanic during the day, and drinking, spending time with friends, and having sex at night"

"Do you ever regret it?"

"No. There's some _people_ I regret, but I wasn't in a position to know any better at the time. But I wouldn't change it. I had a lot of fun. Compared to a lot, I was really lucky. I mean, at least I studied too. I got the best of both" she squeezed his hand. "Did you mean what you said earlier, about your youth?"

"The Mandalorian's saved me. I sort of knew I owed them, and I was only little so I adapted pretty well. Then I took the Creed, and I guess everything got hidden away with my face as soon as I put on my first helmet. It's more than a job; it's a belief and a way of life. I'm a Mandalorian before anything else. That's just how it is" he sighed. "This is the way..."

"So you really did spend your youth training and working?"

"I've had it better than a lot of people"

"Would you get into trouble if they knew about this?"

"...I don't really know what would happen. It's exceptional circumstances" he looked at her again. "I'm glad we've spent time together. I don't regret this. If anyone had to see me without my helmet, I'm glad it was you"

"You shouldn't say things like that"

"Why not?" Din asked, sitting up, suddenly nervous.

Peli sat up too. "Because it makes me want to kiss you again"

Din swallowed. "Nothing's stopping you"

But there was, because he stopped her at the last second. Peli found his hands and held them tight.

"Just a kiss, Mando. That's all" she said. "I promise"

It felt like the end of a chapter, Din thought as they embraced. It was firm, but loving. Somehow it was better than everything else combined: it felt like an understanding. God, he really liked this woman. And she really liked him.

"You're a good man, Mandalorian" Peli said, running her fingers through his hair. 

"I don't know about that" he took a deep breath and looked over at the pile of armour on the floor. "Maybe I should check on the kid"

"Has he seen you without your helmet?"

"Not as far as I know"

He glanced down at himself, still with his trousers and socks on, the blanket covering the rest of him. Oh, what he'd give to just stay there indefinitely, warm and safe with someone he actually trusted.

"I can check on him while you get dressed, if you like?"

"It's ok. I..."

"What?"

"Nothing. Sorry. I'm sorry, about all this"

"You will be sorry when I've clocked you over the head for apologising over something you don't need to be sorry for again" she kissed him hard, stroking his cheek gently. "I'll check on the kid and make us a drink. If he's asleep I'll leave him for you. You get dressed"

Din nodded. He could do with a couple of minutes to himself anyway. 

-

The room felt very different without Peli. Quiet. Din stood up, catching sight of himself in the bedroom mirror. He paused, looking at himself. He'd expected to look a right state - but he didn't. He was still a bit flushed, but other than that, he looked perfectly alright. Peli thought he was cute, anyway. He liked that.

Pulling his clothes and armour back on seemed to take an age. He borrowed a bit of spray and set about, fumbling with every clip, every latch, his mind still making sense of what had happened. It was a damn shame Peli hadn't found the right person - she was so understanding, and nice, and strong-minded, and assertive. But then again, her being single meant that _he_ got to spend time with her. Ok, things hadn't exactly been plain sailing today, but he was trying to focus on the good bits, and not on the little panic attack he'd had at the end.

-

The corridor felt freezing compared to the bedroom. It was almost a relief. He heard a little noise, and looked at the cot. Grogu was just waking up, and he smiled when he saw his Mandalorian looking down at him. Din grinned behind his helmet. 

"Hello, little one! I bet you feel better now you've had a little sleep" he said, scooping the little creature into his arms and giving him a cuddle. "Aww, I'm happy to see you, too! Come on; let's go and see Peli. I'm sure she'll fix you a little snack if you're good"

Grogu gurgled happily, tapping his hands against the familiar beskar armour. Din tickled him lightly and carried him through to the living area.

Peli looked a little taken aback when she saw him, but she didn't say anything, simply placing a straw into one of the mugs on the counter. Din's heart skipped a beat. How could something so simple make him feel so validated, so cared for and understood? It made him want to throw his arms around her. But he didn't.

"How's that cute little kiddo doing?"

"He's ok" Din said. "I think he's still a bit sleepy"

"Well, he looks happy enough. Hopefully he'll settle for you tonight"

"I hope so"

Peli handed him one of the mugs. "It's heavily sugared. I figured you needed a boost"

"Thank you"

Grogu whined, trying to take the cup from him.

"This one's mine" Din said. "Don't snatch"

"Is he hungry?"

"Probably. He usually is"

"Aww. I'll fix him some soup. We don't want him being left out, do we?"

"Thank you. I appreciate it"

Peli smiled. "No problem"

Din set Grogu down on the kitchen unit and Peli helped him with the bowl once it was ready. Din stayed close to him, drinking his tea and making sure the child didn't fall. 

"He's a cute little thing, whatever he is"

"Yeah, he's sweet. When he wants to be" Din said. 

"Bless him... Hey, Mando? Are you ok?"

"I'm fine. The tea's helping" he said. "Why?"

"Just checking. Harder to tell when you've got your kit on"

"I am sorry, you know" he said. "I know you wanted more than I could give you"

"How many times do I have to say? It doesn't matter, honey. You were upfront about sex, I accepted that, and we did say we'd just see what happened. We had a bit of fun, that's all"

"You're too nice, you know. I thought you were going to be angry"

"Why did you think that?"

Din shrugged. "Just an assumption, I suppose"

"Believe me, honey; I'm not into making people do things they don't want to do. I can make the best out of any situation. I wouldn't get angry with you; you haven't done anything wrong. I'd have been angry if you'd stayed quiet and let me do something you didn't want. I don't think I'd ever forgive myself"

"You're proving my point"

Peli laughed. "Is it bad to be nice?"

Din looked at Grogu, stroking his little wrinkly head gently.

"I do have one question for you" Peli said. "Would you do it again?"

"Let you get on top of me again, you mean?"

"I guess so" she said, shrugging one shoulder.

"...Maybe"

Peli smiled. She was starting to realise that 'maybe' was his non-committal way of saying 'yes' a lot of the time. 

"Are you going to stay for a bit?"

Din looked up. He could see the dark sky through the window. "It's getting on a bit. We should give you some space. No doubt you have to get up early tomorrow too"

"No earlier than usual" she said, taking the empty mugs and bowl to the sink. "Still, an early night is a good idea sometimes"

Din watched her carefully, a warm feeling in his chest. Walking into the flat felt like days ago, not a couple of hours. He supposed it had been a long afternoon. Eventful. He still felt a bit stupid for wimping out on her, otherwise he might be inclined to stay longer. Still, Grogu was drifting again - a massive relief after the last few sleepless nights. 

"He looks exhausted, poor baby" Peli said. "I don't think you'll have any trouble getting him to sleep tonight"

"You were right about the solid ground, then. Maybe I'll be able to get some proper rest now" he gathered the child up in his arms, rocking him gently, hoping it would make him sleep sooner. "I should probably be going. He's ready for bed"

"I'll walk you to your ship"

-

It was cold outside, and dark. It all felt a bit unreal.

"So"

"So..." Din swallowed, glad she couldn't see his face now. "Thank you for today. For understanding... And the rest of it"

"My pleasure. I'll see you again soon, won't I?"

"I always seem to end up back here sooner or later"

"You sure do. I'm thinking of reserving you a space; you're here so often"

Din laughed slightly. He wasn't sure what to do now. Should he kiss her? He looked down at Grogu, drifting peacefully in his arms. Peli squeezed his elbow.

"Take care of yourself, Mando"

Din paused. He shifted Grogu into one arm and pulled Peli close, hugging her as best he could with one arm. She hugged him back.

"I'll miss you, you know" she said before she stood back. She cleared her throat. "Thanks for your company, sweetheart. If you want to do it again sometime, just let me know"

"Thank you" he paused for a moment. "Really... See you again soon, ok?"

"I'll hold you to that" she smiled and stooped to kiss Grogu on the forehead. "See you again too, bright eyes"

Din smiled sadly. He was sad to be leaving.

-

Grogu fell asleep just as the Razor Crest steadied. Din carried him down to the back of the ship and settled him in his hammock. 

"Thank god for that" he said quietly. "Goodnight, womp rat"

He breathed a sigh of relief. He was tired from the little green thing keeping him up the last few nights, and his afternoon with Peli had left him utterly exhausted. Maybe now he'd be able to get some rest. He could have a shower first, but he decided he'd do that after he'd got his head down. If he got in the shower, he'd be there for an hour or more, going over every detail of the day. He didn't want to think about what had happened with Peli, not in depth. He'd only get cross with himself for having to stop. Even though Peli had reassured him thoroughly, he still felt bad about it. It was humiliating, crying on her like that. But, he couldn't go back in time. _It is what it is_ , he said to himself. 

Why Peli had gone for him, he'd never know. But, judging by some of her stories, she didn't have the best taste in men. But, she _had_ said he was different. Maybe that's why. Still, she'd made it clear she was still interested, despite what had happened. Although, after they'd spent a big of time talking, it didn't feel like so much of an event anymore. Which was baffling, really. Peli had enough experience under her belt to have anyone, and get a lot more from them than she'd got from him. He hadn't been able to stomach much, really. But she didn't _mind_. She'd even said as long as he was ok, that was all that mattered. She didn't care than he was just an arguable frigid Mandalorian. Wait, scratch that. When they were together, she didn't treat him like a Mandalorian warrior: she treated him like a person. A friend. They _were_ friends. He knew that already.

Din crawled into bed, flopping on his stomach. He pushed his helmet off and pulled a pillow close. He lay there for a while, feeling much like he did when he tried to sleep while drunk. He should probably eat something, but he couldn't really be bothered. He couldn't shut his mind off. He kept thinking about what it had all felt like, what it had sounded like, what had been good and what had made him so needlessly scared. He shook his head, trying to stop his thoughts. He was tired; he wanted to sleep. If he could just act like nothing had happened for a while. If only it were that simple. He kept thinking about the way she spoke to him, so kind and understanding and caring. He felt a little bit guilty, deep down - a niggling shame about showing his face (and a whole lot more). But he didn't regret it. Not all of it. Not exactly. Even though, truth be told, he never should have done it anyway. He pulled his cloak over his head, hoping that blocking out the light would calm his thoughts 

What would they say on Mandalor?

*


End file.
